3 things that I have learned the hard way

1: Time Management is Necessary

A good time management is always necessary as it lets you complete or accomplish more in a short period of time, which as a result will give you a lot of time for yourself. And ‘me’ time is very necessary as you can pamper yourself, think of what to do next, pursue your hobbies and most importantly you can spend a quality time with your friends and beloved ones.

2: Your Problem is Your Problem None of Others Problem

Indians after reading this point it can recollect Daisy Shah’s famously trolled dialogue from Race 3, “Our business is our business. None of your business”. However coming back to the point, whatever problems you have in your life they are completely yours. People might listen to your issues if you share it with them but only very few will understand. You are the only person who needs to deal with your issues. No one will understand your pain or issues as you do.

3: Learn to Say No

Saying No is very important because when you constantly say yes or agree with someone they tend to take you for granted, which is not good at all. You can say ‘No’ without being rude too. Remember, at the end of the day loving yourself is most important and saying yes and then stressing over it will only make you sick.

Monidipa Dutta

That’s all from my side today on withlovemoni.com. See you soon again.

172 thoughts on “3 things that I have learned the hard way”

  1. Catherine Santiago Jose

    Time management is number for me, I am a full-time mother of 2, a full-time worker at home and a full-time wife so managing my time is really important in my daily life.

  2. Three very important things to remember – I appreciate the reminder. I especially resonate with not syaing yes to everything!! We cannot do it all for other people.

    1. Blair villanueva

      I still struggle with time management, but eventually learned to accept it. It wasn’t me, and glad I have reliable team who can handle it great.

  3. I’ve perfected the art of saying no! As you say, as long as you’re not rude, it’s important to be honest if you really don’t want to do, or be somewhere. It’s quite empowering!

  4. Ugh saying no is the most difficult for me. The second point comes naturally I guess cuz I don’t feel comfortable to share my problems. Time Management though is something I’ve just got the habit of doing, it’s very rewarding!

  5. True. I’m getting comfy with saying “no” without giving any explanations. I can’t please people and displease/inconvenience myself at the same time.

  6. Three very important lessons! I am usually pretty good at time management, but sometimes it just gets away from me. While technically, I’m on schedule (or even a tad early) I feel very behind. And yes, it’s important to be able to say no. You have to put yourself above all else.

  7. Recently I have learnt to say no and have my own say and thoughts to things which I was just dealing with simply because I didnt want to hurt others. But yes people just dont bother about your opinion if you dont stand for yourself and learn to say no.

  8. Learning the hard way isn’t always most pleasing but it is always a lesson learned the best.
    As for the list: you can say that again!
    Time management is a nessesity. You can’t live without proper self organization.
    Knowing your problems are your own makes your life surprisingly easier, way easier. It is easier to reason yourself, esp when it goes for your family.
    Saying ‘no’ is golden.

  9. From your list, I’ve definitely learnt that time management is just amust iof one had to be productive. No wonder I try so hard to schedule everything and keep up with my schedule.

  10. I’ve been really working hard on time management lately, particularly in trying to get all the things I like doing least (like cleaning!) right at the beginning of the day. Then I can relax later.

  11. I learned the second in a hard way. Our problem must be kept privately. Betrayal is painful and when we think we can trust a person it hits us hard that we can’t always tell other people everything.

  12. I also have a hard time saying no. But lately I have had to because I just don’t have the time to do it all. Which also applies to time management. 🙂

  13. i have learned to say no the hard way. felt really, really stressful to the point that my boss was so demanding 🙁 we all have to set limits sometimes. good read!

  14. blair villanueva

    Saying NO is very hard for many. I don’t have an issue with that department, since I learned it back in my childhood days.

  15. This is a great post. It is a really good reminder about life and saying no when you really need to think about your own mental health.

  16. These are great lessons. Time management is important. It drives me nuts when people are constantly late. Also, I have learned to say no. If I truly can’t do it, I’ll decline.

  17. It took me a long time to learn that saying no is okay! Sometimes pleasing people is impossible, so you just have to say no and move on.

  18. I think number 2 is something that needs to be taught in school. Take responsibility for your actions, accept your problem is yours and do something about it. Don’t just blame others!

  19. These are great lessons! I’ve learned the hard way about time management, too. It’s so incredibly critical to being successful.

  20. Victoria @ CrazyCharizma

    Now I’m doing many things with time management in mind. Love using omnifocus to put all my ideas and create projects there, love Amy Landino’s idea of calendar blocking and pomodoro app (it sets the timer and you should work without distractions!).

  21. I completely agree with the points you mentioned here. The time management is important, as when we learn that we will have time for more things to experience in our lives. 🙂

  22. Ann F. Snook-Moreau

    I think a lot of people are afraid to say no. We just have to remember that if it will cause you too much stress, you can’t give your best to them anyway!

  23. I love to help people out and sometimes I forget to leave time for my self. Sometimes I take on too much and leave time for me to get a break. I need to learn to say no at times and make time for “me”. Great post thanks for sharing.

  24. Learning to say no is so hard! I’ve been working on this for a while now. I don’t even know how it started, haha! I’m not a people pleaser. But I still have a hard time with not saying no.

  25. Saying “no” is very important to productivity and fulfillment. Often people will sacrifice something important to them in order to please someone else. Rest and self-care are incredibly important!

  26. I seriously couldnt agree more with all three points, especially the last two. It took me a while to come to terms that I can’t say yes always. I have to be selective so that I can find some balance that works for me. It’s liberating to say the least.

  27. These are all very important lessons. I think many of us have learned them the hard way however I think that helps make them more valuable lessons to us!

  28. Learning to say no is something that I really need to try to do myself. I feel like I’m always overcommitting myself!

  29. Geraline Batarra

    Saying no is really hard for me to say because I was thinking that I can offend a person if I say that word to the person but now, I already learned to say it and it really gives me a relief.

  30. 3 crucial tips to be successful and living happily in our life. Time management is important and should prioritize things and do what’s important. The no.2 tips will make us happier as we stop blaming others or hope others will help us solve them.

  31. I strongly disagree with point #2, as it’s never a good idea to bottle your problems up – perhaps you meant more specifically not to share your problems with everyone in your life, i.e. workplace, etc.; but everybody needs someone to vent to, to bounce ideas off, to help them through. Family and close friends have pulled me through some very difficult times in my life, and I’m so grateful for them 🙂

  32. I can relate to #2 a lot because I have been receiving a lot of problems lately. I have to be the commander and try to find the root of the problem and solution by myself.

  33. What a great post! I think the best way to learn is on your own mistakes (even though some people tend to learn from others)! I also think that your problem is a problem as long as you treat it as a problem. It’s all in our heads!

  34. Time management is something I’ve learned the hard way, too! When you have a lot to juggle, it can be hard to prioritize. Thanks for great tips!

  35. I truly believe you learned by your mistakes, no matter in personal or professional life. No need to think you have to be perfect in any ways. Good luck!

  36. Saying no is quite liberating. I used to have difficulty saying no because I wanted to please everyone. That is until I learned that it’s impossible to make everyone happy. Saying no more often has made me happier actually. xo, Suzanne

  37. I think saying no is my main issue, as much as I should be saying it, I end up thinking of what people would think if I don’t comply. I will be stopping that though.

  38. Saying no helps you to define who you are for sure. It is a hard thing to do at times because no one wants to say no. We want to say yes because we want to be helpful. But it’s so useful to say no because it helps us to put boundaries on who we are and what others expect from us.

  39. Ha! I learn everything the hard way, it seems. I still am working on saying NO more often, it’s easy to say no to people that I’m close to, but people who don’t know me for some reason it’s harder to say NO? I don’t know why I’m like that, gotta work on it! I am all about balance and time management though, working from home as a freelance writer/blogger since 2006 I have had to learn Time Management to raise three kids on this income successfully 😉

  40. Nice post! Yeah i can deffo relate…I need to learn to say no sometimes in order to have me time but also because i struggle to manage my time too! i try to jam too much in one day and end being exhausted. Cheers for sharing your experience.

  41. These are all good points. I hear you about your problems versus others problems. I think a lot of it really has to do with where we are in our lives. One person may be a new parent, another is in college, etc – it is hard to relate sometimes.

  42. Elle (CleverlyChanging)

    The reoccurring them of advice I’ve heard lately is that people should learn to say “No.” it’s not that hard for me, but more than anything else I need to learn how to mark smarter and faster.

  43. Love the one about saying no!! I think we all live to please and we don’t think saying no is an option because we don’t want to let anyone down! But we need to sometimes say no when we don’t agree or when we’ve taken on to much

  44. Such a great read for me, learning to say no is really the hardest things for me to do but now I am trying my best to say that word.

  45. Saying NO and acknowledging that it’s a full sentence and I don’t need to explain myself is one of those things I still am reminding myself.

  46. Those things are very important to ourlife. And I think time management is the best important things because it will make the work more easily.

  47. I find that when I try to do too many things at the same time, I end up being less productive and taking longer to complete my to do list. Now I am so much more focussed and prioritise what is most important over what can wait a bit. After getting close to the point of burn out I realized that even though I had days off from a stressful job, I still didn’t make time to pamper myself and set about to change that. I am much more stress free these days 🙂

  48. It took me so long to get on the no train. Learning to say no has been a huge accomplishment for me. Still need to work on other areas… 🙂

  49. I think number 3, learning to say no is so relatable. I always say yes to everything but lately I’ve been saying no and my life has been so much easier and less-stressful

  50. It is great to know that you learn these things on time. I somehow manage my time and understand that my problems are the only mine but say no is one of the toughest things for me

  51. These are all great tips. You are very right, time management is everything. I know there isn’t enough time in the day to get everything we need done, but time management definitely helps a lot!

  52. Time management and saying no are key points for me. However, I have to get better at saying no as sometimes it’s so hard to do so when your family/loved ones are in the picture.

  53. i hear that your problem is your problem loud and clear. Its not that others cant help or hear you but we all have to marninate that WE have to be in tune with out problems

  54. These are things I learnt later in adulthood especially learning to say no and your problems are your own. I’ve learnt self love over these last few years.

  55. Wish I’d read this 10 years ago…I wonder if everyone must go through these lessons personally, like we’re wired for the had lessons, or if they can just read your words and avoid wasted time. It would be nice if we listened more! Thank you for helping!

  56. Agree with you on each and every point. I am working very hard to say NO. I know its difficult but I am sure soon I will learn this. Very well written post. Thanks for sharing this

  57. I am perfectly good with my time management and resolving my problem but I can say, saying NO is the big issue for me. It is so hard for me to say that because I am always thinking that when I say that people will no longer like me but my husband told me that it is okay to say NO and that is not a bad thing to do.

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